Dear Young Lady,
I write this letter in hopes that you will find it within you to stand firm, stand tall and believe.
There are many things in this life that will be obstacles to overcome. Starting with the awkwardness of being taught to remain a young lady in a world full of sexual promiscuity.
Growing up with celebrities showing more and more skin; being more and more outrageous with their behaviors and the public pretty much praising them and growing even more ga-ga at their every misdeed and misfortune. The world around you is changing fast and times even faster. It seems you can't keep up no matter how hard you try.
I would like to take the time to talk to you about your problems. Let me start off by saying..... even though there are times you don't feel it at all; you are loved. Even though there are times when you feel like the world around you is crumbling and crashing at your feet; there is stability and safety.
You are just looking in the wrong places.
You have girlfriends, but you are so worried about them seeing the real, insecure you, that you never really show them who you are and by the time you muster up the courage to do so.... they will have moved on from the superficial relationship you are willing to offer to one that has more substance. Hold firm and be yourself, because that is what drew them in, in the first place. There is something to be said about deep long-lasting friendships that stand the test of time. Those are the friends that will become your sisters in life. They will be there for you during all the momentous moments. The first kiss, the engagement, the wedding, the birth of the first child, the loss of a loved one.... but if you aren't willing to open your heart to them, how can you expect them to be a part of it?
I know that girls in their teens are tough. There are all these emotions, and expectations, jealousy, cattiness and the like. But did it ever occur to you that maybe, just maybe they are just as insecure about themselves as you are?
Give them a break. They may surprise you.
Your self image is proving to be your biggest downfall. You see the images all around you of waif thin models who looks like they could fit in with the images of a refugee camp. Yet, all these models are being said to be the most beautiful, or most fit, or most healthy. You look into the mirror and see curves, and muscles, and instead of seeing the physically fit and active young woman you are becoming, you see a fat, disgusting female form. Not someone beautiful, not someone unique, but a freak of nature that deserves to be hated.
Don't let the world dictate to you what your form should look like. God created you to be curvy, to be a woman capable of creating life. Those hips are needed. How else could you carry a baby to term if there was no room? That precious life you may someday bring into this world needs room to grow in a healthy body.
You are beautiful. You are not fat. You are not disgusting. Food and Eating is not your enemy, but those voices in your head are. You know those voices.... the ones telling you that the hunger pains are good, and if you can skip one meal, why not two, why not three, lets see how long you can go.... Yeah, those voices. Those are the ones you should be ignoring. They are killing any semblance of love you have left for yourself.
I just want to let you know, that real men like women who look like women. Not skeletons. Your future husband will not want to hold your hand if he fears he may break it. He won't want to embrace you if he is worried about cracking a rib.
Which brings me to my next point.
Young men. They are a cruel species. Don't get me wrong, many grow up to be fine, God fearing and respectable men, but at this point in the game it is way to early to be giving your heart to anyone. You don't even love yourself, yet you are going to put every ounce of love you have left into a young man that at this point you cannot say will be with you forever. Oh, he may promise to love you forever, and never leave you, but promises are words. Don't let words be the reason you are lost forever. Don't let words be the reason you've given so much of yourself that there is nothing left to hold on to.
The pain and regret of loving so deeply at such a young age will haunt you forever. There will be nights woken in terror, and a song or smell can bring the heartbreak back like it just happened yesterday even if its been years ago. Giving yourself so completely should only ever be to your husband. Protect your heart and all that goes along with it. Its the only one you have and its precious. Yes, you may not think you are worth that much; But I tell you dear one... You are precious and a perfect version of you. There will never be another and even if the people in your life now, do not accept and love you for what you "are" willing to offer, there is (and assure) others that will be more than happy with that.
Many things in this life will bring you heartache, but none more severely than loving and giving of yourself too deeply before its time. Timing is not ours. It happens when its supposed to and no matter how we may try to force it to fill the broken heart it won't work. You see the problem is that you broke your own heart. How can a broken glass hold any water? How can a cracked vase hold the water to keep the plant alive? It can't. You need to heal before your ready to offer any part of yourself to another. That takes time, that takes growth, and knowledge. Please, I am begging you... please, protect your heart. Invest in the friends you have around you.
The loneliness and pain will lead to years of trying to find anything to numb the ache. That will only serve to bring you more loneliness and more pain.
Don't follow this path. Stop and heed my warnings. I love you dear one. More than you would ever think I could.

Signed,
Your future self.