So for as long as I've been an adult, I've also been someone's mother. One of the perks of being a young mom, is having the energy to keep up with your child/ren. One of the downfalls is...... you haven't really established who you are in the world (Other than someone's mom.) I'm talking about profession, career and your place in this world outside of being care taker. Now, don't get me wrong. I wouldn't change my life for anything in this world. EVER. I love my children dearly. I love my husband dearly,...... but I'm almost 40 and still don't know what I'd like to do with the rest of my life.
I'm feeling a bit discouraged. I've always been interested in making others feel better about themselves, and thought.... "Hey, Cosmetology school is the perfect place for someone like me." Especially since I've always been fascinated with hair, skin, and nails.
While I feel I could do the work, and could make a successful career out of this... this is one drawback..... COST.
How am I supposed to go to school, still be a full time mom, and afford school without it affecting one of the other areas in my family's life? I've looked into financial aid and even had them break it down for me into monthly payments. I asked "If I got the highest amount in grants; what would my total cost for schooling be?" And the amount I'd have to pay if I didn't go into debt with a student loan is almost the same as my monthly rent.
I'm not about to take out a student loan, and saving THAT much money is going to take forever.... so HOW am I supposed to contribute to a better future with my husband if I am unable to have an actual career?
Here is where I am leaving it in God's hands. There is nothing else I can do. I'm not gonna lie. I am VERY discouraged, and feeling very "unworthy" and like I will be nothing more than a home cook, toilet scrubbing, sheet washing, taxi service...... but I am still not giving up.
There is a career out there that will make me happy and it involves more than just ringing groceries or running a drive through at a fast food place. I want a career that is MINE and tailored to ME. I don't believe God would have put this on my heart if it weren't meant for me.
Well, thats all I got for now. Back to see what sort of scholarships are actually out there for people like me that aren't "fresh" out of high school with a 4.0 gpa.
lol
Wish me luck and your prayers are appreciated.